orchard.it

“Open Up – This is the Police”

Posted by in Travel Nightmare

Mostly my stays in hotels are OK.  I occasionally have to go back down to the lobby when my keycard doesn’t work, or (like this week in Munich) I get less sleep than I’d like because thousands of Oktoberfesters sing in the street until the early hours.  Like I said – not a big problem. Sometimes though shit happens that not only ruins the trip, but also makes you wonder if we aren’t living in a simulation… A couple of weeks ago I visited Chicago – a splendid city that…read more

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To San Jose…

Posted by in Travel Nightmare

This is more of a boast than a beef.  I may have set my new record for ridiculous business travel.  OK check this out : Monday Genova -> Rome -> Detroit -> Phoenix Tuesday -> Salt Lake City -> San Jose Wednesday -> Cupertino -> Santa Cruz -> Los Angeles Thursday -> Paris -> Genova

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…to Chicago

Posted by in Travel Nightmare

Voltaire wrote in his poem “La Bégueule” that “Le mieux est l’ennemi du bien”. Sometimes perfection is the enemy of the good; and in my attempt to arrive in Chicago at a perfect 1pm (waking at 4.30 and connecting through 3 cities), I ended up in Frankfurt, delayed for 6 hours. It’s a common story, but frustrating nonetheless. A relatively tight connection, a slightly delayed flight, and UTTER INCOMPETENCE from ground crew, and my productive day turns into a waiting game. In this case I was first off the plane,…read more

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…to Baltimore

Posted by in Travel Nightmare

OK, so this one was my fault.  A miscalculation. I live about half an hour from my local airport, and typically wake up about 90 minutes before the 6am flight leaves. Except this morning the alarm rang 30 minutes before departure and I set a new record : bed to gate in 20 minutes, boarding pass in hand. I’d called ahead and the amazing front-office personnel at the airport fast-tracked me through security, only to see the gate shut in my face. If you live in a country for any…read more

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…to Orlando

Posted by in Travel Nightmare

I live in a great Italian town with one giant flaw : it’s a shitty place to fly out of, with direct connections limited to a handful of cities a few times a week. To get to Orlando, I therefore had to drive to Milan, and fly through Frankfurt – something like a 17 hour trip door-to-door. Our commentary starts at hour 4, sitting on the plane in Milan : “Goodmorning ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to this Lufthansa flight to Frankfurt. We are delighted to welcome you on board. We…read more

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